DuBose Thankfulness

I won't be able to spend any time with my parents and siblings for Thanksgiving, so in case they read this during this season, I wanted to be sure they knew of my thankfulness. Here goes:

• I am thankful for picking up cans.
  I can almost see Mama's face over that one. She's waited umpteen years to hear me say that, and even now, she doesn't get to HEAR me say it except in her mind as she reads it :D
  But seriously, I'm thankful Mama made me pick up cans to pay for my trip to Australia. It was humiliating at the time, but I look back now at the humble quality it instilled in me and the appreciation I gained to be able to take such a trip. It worked, Mama!
• I am thankful for cupcakes and wii and Guitar Hero.
  I'm not a big fan of cupcakes, but sharing them with my sister over a game of "battle of the bands" (whatever the game was called) makes them the best treat in the world.
• I am thankful for buckskin.
  When I was 17, I had stars in my eyes and wanted to give my beau a Christmas present he would never forget, something with meaning to him. I came up with what I wanted to make, but had no idea how to get the supplies or how to make one. My daddy took me to the shoe cobbler in town, bought me beautiful golden buckskin and then designed a leather pouch that is so unique and beautiful. Tommy still has it, still uses it, and still marvels over it more than 20 years later. What I gained from it is a memory of my daddy, and how important it was to him to help me with this,....thank you daddy!
• I am thankful for Facebook.
  That's insane, I know! But that's the place I have gotten to know my little sister. She still does "little sister stuff" and I roll my eyes at her, but I've gotten to see things about her I've never had the chance to see otherwise. I've been able to watch my nephews grow when space and time have not allowed me to otherwise. I've even been able to argue with Doug there, and that's just plain fun!
• I'm thankful for roadkill.
  No kidding- ROADKILL! David and I actually went on a roadkill hunt once...but the hides we were going for were just bonus. It was the time to be together and talk,...something we've only done about 3 times in our whole lives.
  

These are only a few things. I am thankful for SO many things. The internet just isn't a big enough place for my gratitude, so I'll leave it at this,....and a note to my family that I love you all.... soo soo much!

Have good food, good conversation, and good feelings among you and think of me for a moment this Thanksgiving Day!

Family Excursion

I have been quite remiss in keeping content on my blog. I should apologize for that, truly I should,... but I plead insanity instead. If you read the post just prior to this one, you know that my poor respiratory system has been trounced upon for quite sometime and that my stress levels have looked down upon the highest mountains,.... and therefore it stands to reason that my emotions needed some relief from it all. I did get past that allergy of the dog dander, but wouldn't you know it---there is something else in my house disrupting my system? I'm guessing mold. It seems like all that's left to blame! I want to rip the carpet out of my house and bleach everything, but that seems a little extreme especially considering how much help I'll have available to me in such an undertaking,.... so its not done yet,....and I'm not well yet either. My sinuses quit being my friend a long time ago anyway,....

So let's move along,....

I've looked in all sorts of directions for that mind numbing relief that makes everything tolerable for a time. I found games,...not just one game, ... LOTS of games! I got wound up tight in those and had to involved my family in them. I hooked up with Lee and together we make a fierce a mafia who farms well during the day and indulges in vampire activities at night. We're good :)

That worked for a while. I was distracted. And then a little agreement came due.

Let's back up in time for a moment.
We have a friend. He lives in Nashville, but he came to a powwow we were at and that's where we met him. He is Lakota, so there is our common ground. He's a super nice guy and a really great musician. We've gotten together with him a few times and have a new but special friendship with him. Can't really explain it beyond that. Well, he had spoken at the University of Alabama in Huntsville last year, and they wanted him back. He had a conflicting schedule though, so he recommended ME to take his place. I agreed. I figured it was no different than the many times I had spoken to middle school and primary school kids, right? WRONG! There was a contract I had to sign, ... and I was formally introduced! That was a first!

We got our regalia together and packed up a collection of my beadwork and some herbs and headed to Alabama last week. We stayed in a nice conference center/ hotel and had the BEST continental breakfast I have ever had in all my life!!! SERIOUSLY! We got up and got our buckskins on and were escorted to the building where we were to present our culture. Our topic was native medicines and beadwork,... so I approached it this way:

A medicine wheel represents that circle of life Disney made so famous. It has so much symbolism in it that I could go on and on about that. I won't do that here, so if you want to know it you'll have to ask me. The basic gist I expressed was that there are 4 aspects to your health. You are the center of this wheel, where all the responsibility lies. The 4 aspects are: mental, physical, emotional and spiritual. To relate these things, I described a medical doctor. If you are sick and go to a doctor, you are getting great assistance for your PHYSICAL health, but he doesn't even think about the other aspects of your health. If you are under stress, that is a mental difficulty that leads to a physical condition. That physical condition leads to an emotional depression and when we get to that point, we have no where to go but to our God in prayer. That's why hospitals put chapels in their buildings!

The native point of view is to focus on all these aspects yourself and seek help when you need it,....in all areas. So we approached our demonstration from there on in a similar way. Tommy told a story we tell children about a boy and a snake. The boy carried a snake from the cold mountains to the warm valley, but the snake bit the boy at the end of their trail. They boy asked why and the snake said "you knew what I was when you picked me up!" That moral teaches us to think first,...and be prepared for consequences. Choose wisely and the consequences will be easier to endure.

The physical aspect of health, of course, was herbal in nature. I showed some herbs, talked of ways I use them and how they came into my life. I had a good bit of interest in that! I was surprised!

Then was the emotional aspect of health and I feel creativity is involved there. In aboriginal healing ceremonies, images might be painted on a body, songs sung, beauty brought in,... and this is where I displayed my beadwork. If you let your creativity be a part of your life, that beauty will work to lift your spirits often.

Then we go to the spiritual aspect of health, which is your relationship with your Creator. At this point, Manti and Mesa sang two prayer songs. You never heard the like! I wish I could have recorded that, it was so awe inspiring and beautiful! It wasn't that professional sound you look for in a musician,....it was soul warming purity.

We ended with a Q&A session and then we let one of their instructors take a couple pictures of us. This is one he took with Manti's camera for us. What a time we had!

Another Diagnosis

If you've been anywhere near me since last April, you've heard me cough. I have done nothing BUT cough since then and have hated it passionately. I couldn't get it to settle down, so I gave in and went to the clinic and saw the nurse practitioner. Don't get me wrong, she's a nice lady and has helped my family most times she's seen any of us over the years....but if I went in there with a pain in my foot, she'd tell me I had a sinus infection. It's about the only diagnosis we ever hear.

April, my sinus infection was different. I had all these other irritating symptoms too, like watery itching eyes and aching ears. My neck even hurt some. So I went to see her and got the dreaded diagnosis: sinus infection due to allergies. Well that was something new! I'd never had allergies before so didn't recognize those symptoms when they struck ME. But that's handle-able so we took care of it (that means I did take the antibiotic and claritin, and also took my herbs.) It eased up, but I had a little bit of a cough that lingered. Just the annoying noise, nothing major.

Then along comes June and BAM! It struck again full force and miserable! I recognized it as identical to the April incident, so why pay the clinic to tell me that? I just got another box of claritin, nyquil to knock me out and took more herbs. It went on its way and all that lingered was a little nagging cough. Then along comes August and BAM again. Just exactly the same thing. This is so unfair. It didn't help that these events were also coinciding with Tommy's episodes.

Well, here it is September and wouldn't you know it,....it hits me again. Now I've dealt with this garbage in the spring, the summer....and now the fall. What the heck am I allergic to? The pollens should all be different? Was I THAT unhealthy?

We made plans to go out of town. I had the dreaded sinus stuff hit just a couple days before. I got well enough I could survive the trip, and then the day we were supposed to go home, Tommy's health got a bit stressed. So we stayed. That next day, I got the full brunt of this irritation. It was awful,....but it wasn't the worst. That was still to come for the day we left Tennessee to drive back home. THAT was the worst of it! I lost bladder control weeks ago, so that's not new, but the serious pain in my kidneys was. Every cough was like a vice clamping down on each kidney squeezing the life out of me. It was so bad I couldn't drive and had to turn the wheel over to Tommy. I cried the rest of the way home. Having babies isn't quite that bad! Skipping past some of the details here ... Yesterday I got up and called one of Tommy's doctors. I don't have insurance and was scared to go see them, but had to know for sure if I had swine flu and the clinic had just misdiagnosed me. I haven't had all the symptoms for that, but it has been found in my region, so I had to be sure. We went and saw the doc and she asked when I first started showing signs of allergy. I told her about the April visit to the clinic. And she asked me when I got over it. I told her I never really had completely, that I always had a bit of a cough left behind. A few more questions later, she tells me I need to rip out the carpet in my house and put my dog outside! She said the pollens aren't getting me, my house is!

My opinion here: The dog has been here since last year and she's only indoors in the evenings. She's not going anywhere until I'm forced to put her out. The house though,.....

When I was younger, my mother told me that all it took for a word to be bad was intend it to have a bad meaning. She said I could even say "hot dog!" and that be a bad word if I had bad intentions when I used it.

My house is a piece of HOT DOG! Tommy inherited it from his parents and I can't tell if its been a blessing or a curse. Right now, I'm cursing it with every Oscar Myer word I can come up with.

Good news is.... I was right! It's a sinus infection that is bacterial,...and the bacteria is a resistant variety that has gotten firm hold of my sinus cavity. Thats why nothing has helped me much all this time, only helped me bide my time. The house keeps feeding the infection so it stays strong and I stay weak. I'm not contagious but I'm not getting it over it rapidly. I've got new meds: a stronger antibiotic (the stuff they use for anthrax) and a steroid and 2 cough suppressants plus robitussin and claritin again. Oh and one of those tablets is VILE tasting! I have to cram food and such in my mouth with it to get it down and not throw it up. The doc told me I could feel this way for another week, but next week I should feel some better and in 2 months I should be well. yeah.... t w o l o n g f r e a k i n' h o t d o g m o n t h s!

Anyone have a tissue?

Traditional Haircut? Not at MY house!

My little boys have begged and pleaded for mohawks, bald heads, long hair,... anything but "traditional" barber shop buzz cuts. I'm fine with not looking like ever other Tom, Dick and Harry,....oh wait, ... looking like TOM is ok. For several months, Morgan had a mohawk. It wasn't an ugly spiked thing that made you look for piercings and hair dye, it was very tasteful. Well all the sudden, every boy his age at church had a mohawk just like him! then he started seeing them at Walmart, and at Publix, ... and soon every boy his age had the same haircut and his wasn't unique anymore. He was done with it. So I cut it off and he started growing it. But he didn't want the Shaggy look (remember Shaggy, Scooby Doo's friend?). So what was Morgan's look?

About a month ago, Manti ordered a movie called The Song of Hiawatha. It's a REALLY FABULOUS movie! I highly recommend it! The main character has a very unique haircut. It is traditionally accurate for native people of that time period in that area of the country,...and low and behold, we've traced Tommy's ancestry to that neck of the woods too! So I asked Morgan if he'd like THAT haircut. What do you think?

The boys liked it, Tommy agreed, and I found a hairdresser willing to do it. Today was the day. Tommy and the boys went to the dentist for their regular cleanings and I stayed home playing the movie over and over and taking pictures to have one to take with us to the hairdresser. Can you believe that this awesome actor only has photos of his face? None of the back of his head!

I got the before pictures...


Docile enough, but definitely shaggy.
And then we have the "after shots"...




It's different all right! I think I like it! But what really makes this a great "do" is Jared. He is finatical that nobody and nothing "mess up" his hair. We left the building and walked outside. He started screaming NOOOOo! And holding his head. He was livid that the wind had the nerve to try to mess up his hair. And he won't let anybody touch him for fear they'll mess up his hair. No woman was ever this diligent in protecting their newly coiffed do!

Just wait,...that tiny ponytail will grow longer ;)

The Mustache

Did you ever wonder what Manti would look like with a mustache?

Heart Drama

At first it, was just a little "drama"....but by the end of the week, you could change the D to a T and slide a U in after the A! T-R-A-U-M-A!



So if you don't know what I'm talking about (and I can't imagine there is anyone out there who doesn't, but just in case....) I'll fill you in. June 1st, Tommy had a heart attack. That's old news, I know. His healing process from that included 3 months of "cardiac rehab", which consists of exercising while nurses monitor blood pressure and heart rate. Luckily, the rehab unit is across the hall from the cardiologist, and both are housed in the hospital.



So last week, I was coughing my guts up from whatever I caught while we were at our survival campout. I didn't think I was going to survive, so I had Manti take him to his appointments while I stayed home desperately trying to stop coughing. All went fine on Monday. Tuesday is an "off day". Wednesday he went in for rehab and did his exercises,...but his blood pressure didn't respond so nicely. It stayed too low. He got dizzy and started passing out. So the nurses put him on a stretcher and sent him across the hall to the cardiologist. From there, he got admitted to the hospital for observation. So Tommy calls me to tell me this, not thinking he was staying overnight. By evening though, it had turned into an overnight stay since his pressure just wasn't normalizing so nicely. They scheduled him to get a stress test (the kind done with a chemical instead of a treadmill) for the next day, so I stayed home and prayed for cough relief so I could go be with him on THursday.

Thursday came and I took off for the hospital. Manti traded cars with me (because we've heard talk amongst city police that Dodge vehicles have been targetted lately by car thieves and my durango is quite red. There was even a dodge stolen out of the hospital parking deck where we always park!) and he headed home to help with the younger kids. I waited for 2 hours before Tommy came back to the room from his stress test. Then he had to wait....and wait...and wait,... At 8pm, his cardiologist came in and apologized saying there were so many tests run that day that they hadn't gotten them all processed yet. So since it was so late, he had to stay another night for him to read the results, but everything was looking good and he could probably go home in the morning. He thought it might have been a lot of stress: the rehab exercises, his sick wife and 2 youngest sons, medicine adjustments,... that kind of thing. At 10pm, the doctor came back in and tells us the results are in,...and something is wrong. We don't know what for sure until he has a heart catheter done. *SIGH* That means we're there overnight again, and the next day wouldn't be as pleasant.

So we try to sleep that night and plan for a heart cath about noon on Friday. Noon came and went....he got prepped and medically prepared....but the doctor had other patients he couldn't leave and the procedure got put off till 4pm. All shaved and no needles ready to go! Just at 4:00 though, in come the cath lab techs and they wheel his entire bed down the hall instead of putting him in a wheelchair! I was surprised by that. They headed for the staff elevator (also surprised me) and let me follow. We "landed" right near the room where they procedure was going to go on and they said "he's prepped already, let's start now" and I started hearing tools collected and people gathering to work on him before I got out of sight of the door! I was the only one in the waiting room...just me and Maury Povich (by the way, that guy was NOT the father).... the office area had already closed, so not even a secretary to look at. I sat down....stood up, ... sat down.... and got sick at my stomach with worry. Something just started eating at me and scaring me. I started pacing the floor and thought "I'll just call someone". So i called Sheryl (i call her my sister in law, even though its more common law) and told her what was happening.

Shortly after, one of the technicians came out to tell me they found a blockage and had to do a stint, so it would be a few more minutes. He couldn't (or wouldn't, whichever applies) answer my questions, but did tell me he had been in on the LAST stint back in June and didn't recall seeing a blockage like this one at that time. Then he went back to the room .... leaving me alone to bawl like a baby. I called Linda, my boss. I wa supposed to work that weekend and felt so guilty about leaving her hanging like I was having to do to be with him. She was a friend at the time I needed one and she said all the right things,....just like a mother does. What a blessing she is in my life!! She's a real jewel!

I hung up from that, and called my mother. I wasn't done crying yet and Linda stirred up my need for my mommmy. While talking to my mom, the doctor came out. He wasn't wearing scrubs or a lab coat or anything! He was in a SHARP suit! It had to be a costly one too, and totally shocked me to see him that way. I almost forgot my questions! he told me all was fine and about the blockage. He described it as a straw that tapes off on one end. He said where the tapering happens, there was a blockage that WAS there previously. But during the last 2 months, Tommy has been improving and the build up on his arteries was diminishing. That allows the vessels and arteries to open up a bit. A blockage though is a bit thicker and takes more time to demonstrate change. So the opening happened on the other side of it, and by opening up, it seemed to have put a little pressure downward ONTO the blockage. Originally I think he said it was 45% blocked, and now it had become 95-99% blocked. That's drastic I think!

So they put another stint in and the blood flowed nicely through. He didn't have a heart attack because they found this and took care of it before anything could happen. That means no additional damage to the heart muscle.....which means better opportunities for healing and feeling better. AWESOME!

Back to his room after that with word that he goes home Saturday morning. We're glad to hear that! It's already night, and this is the femoral artery we're talking about running a hose through, so it takes a while for blood to clot and be safe enough for him to move around. Saturday morning comes and the nurse comes in to do orthostatic blood pressure monitoring. This means they took his pressure laying down, sitting up and standing. When he got to the standing position, his pressure dropped 20 points. It had been doing that all along, so he and I didn't think anything of it. The doctor noticed though. He said "hook him back up to iv fluids, he's staying till this afternoon." That same time, Mesa called me to tell me how sick she was and that she'd been throwing up all over the place. She needed help, so I had Manti come back to the hospital, trade cars again and stay with his daddy so I could go home and take care of my youngest 3.

That night, they call me and tell me he'll be staying till Sunday. Welll Sunday came and he actually DID get to come home. But with medicine changes and a pair of support stockings.

WHEW! What a week, huh? And I coughed all the way through it :D

My Survivors

Meet some of the members of BSA Venture Crew 7. We went camping and did it "survivalist style". That means we took no tents, no camp stoves, no "Coleman". We built shelters out of whatever was available. We cooked food over an open fire. We braved a thunderstorm and poison ivy and scorpions and impressed even ourselves that we could do it. We really "roughed it"!

And these 4 kids all made my heart swell up with pride. I looked around at one point and saw them all sitting like this...together...voluntarily...HAPPILY! I could have cried with joy at such a sight! Aren't they something?

This is Mesa's shelter. She has used trees and limbs and a thick muscadine vine as braces. She has leaned support branches found on the ground up against the back side of her tree braces and then stretched a tarp over the top and down the back side. She had a second tarp, so using muscadine vines, the second tarp got tied to the grommets of the first tarp, which gave her another wall. A long branch she found on the ground held the second tarp out and gave her extra space inside her shelter. Isn't it great?

And this is Manti's shelter. He built a wikiup with limbs and branches and muscadine vines. Then he spread River Cane and leaves all over it, which actually did hold out the rain that fell! You can see a small fire glowing inside. That fire chased out bugs and kept him comfortable during the rainstorm. He made that all by himself. I'm so proud!

Don't they just make you smile?