Thursday, August 12, 2010


I always hate it when people are overly dramatic. So why is it that I am Drama Queen of Queens? Don't ask me why I pick today to be whiny, I just did. It's ok if you decide to hit the X on your browser and wait for a different blog later. I won't mind. Just don't TELL me that's what you did ;)

Whine #1: Why is it the days I am scheduled to work are the mornings when I wake up after having just a couple hours of sleep? I would like an extra couple hours please!

Whine #2: Why can't I pick the people my kids choose to have to emotional ties to? I just "know" I could save them aches and pains if they would just do it MY way!

Whine #3: Why do I have to be so black and white oriented? Why is it that I can't let there be some gray areas in my life? Gray just drives me crazy and I don't know why. I'm tired of being crazy. I want to feel like I can be normal sometimes too. It's not fun being tense and stressed ALL the time.

Whine #4: Why is the "poorhouse" my destiny? I don't have to be rich,...really I don't! I don't dream of that at all, actually! I just want to stop worrying EVERYday of how to make ends meet. Yeah yeah, I know that when I figure something out, the relief it brings is a bittersweet I would never know otherwise, but GOOD GRIEF!!! Can I not find out what its like to NOT have the intense fear first? I just want to pay a few bills easily for a change and not have to sell blood or children to do it.

Whine #5: Where did all my energy go? Don't tell me its because I have 4 children and a disabled husband all living at home. Don't tell me its just stress. I know a few ladies who have more kids than I do, their ages are closer together than mine, and they STILL have make up on every day and their houses clean and their bills paid and a 1950's air around then. One of them gets up at dawn and even exercises before her children get up, so she can cook them breakfast and send them to school! I think I hate her.

Whine #6: How come when Tommy worked, he would come home to find dinner ready (or nearly so) and the house semi-straightened and his kids happy to see me. Lots of times I met him at the door with hugs and kisses.... and now that its ME working... none of that stuff happens? Sometimes Mesa cooks and sometimes she does some straightening up around the house,...and that's it.

Whine #7: I don't like cats. Yeah I know, giving Manti a kitten for his 18th birthday was my idea because Manti DOES like cats and wanted one,.... so why does the stupid thing have to live in my house? I'm the only one that gets bit by fleas when she picks them up. I'm the only one who ends up with cat hair in my dinner plate. I'm the only one that gets bothered by the litter box odors. I'm the only one who freaks out when she jumps up on the table, the kitchen counter or the stove (and I freak LOUDLY when she does). So why does the cat need to be in the house?

I guess that's enough whining,...nobody cares anyway, right?

On a happier note, I've lost 15 pounds! Can't see it, probably lost it from my bra instead of my belly,.... but its 15 pounds. I'll take it.


  1. I read your post, and it made me so sad. I care. I wish I could make life better for you. If I ever get my own magic wand, or win the lottery, or rub the right lamp and get three wishes, you're the first one I'll help.

  2. Life isn't "bad"... its just hard. Some days I have more strength to tolerate it than others. So if you get the lamp or the wand, just wish for me to struggle less and that will be good enough :)
    Thanks for caring Mom. It actually helps to know that :)

  3. 15 lbs?!!! Holy cow, girl! Whatever you're doing, keep doing it! But durn, ain't it the truth? The chest is the first to go! Keep up the good work!

    I love your background! :)